I've been wanting to blog about this for a while - but haven't.
I want people to be aware.
I want people to understand this heartbreak.
I want people to realize how often miscarriage happens.
And I'm going to use my own life to demonstrate.
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I started the month of October with 7 pregnant girlfriends.
I started November with only 4 pregnant girlfriends.
Girlfriend's #1, 2, and 3 have miscarried.
And #4 is dangerously close to miscarriage - she is 10 weeks along and doctor's are having a hard time finding her baby's heartbeat as I write this.
Girlfriends # 5, 6, and 7 are lucky.
This is how I feel.
You are LUCKY if you have a baby.
If you stay pregnant.
Miscarriage is so prevalent!
Why don't we talk about this more often?
I want to scream from the mountaintops, "YOU DO NOT HAVE TO SUFFER SILENTLY!"
When I first miscarried, I had no idea who I could turn to (besides family).
So many parents feel isolated & lonely ... and the heartache is like non-other.
I was fortunate to have a wonderful counselor I turned to - but many do not.
Support groups are prevalent and easy to find on the Internet.
I don't have a smart or profound conclusion to this post - I just want you to know
- My heart breaks for so many of my friends
- We are not alone
- I feel a stirring inside me about doing something about this
- I'm not sure what that stirring is - but it excites me - and I'm not going to ignore it
Love you guys.
xoxo
So true, Lisa and so very heartbreaking. I miscarried last week . . . it was my third according to my OB-GYN file, but she suspects I've had others. The sadness leaves a hole in your heart, a feeling of failure and so many 'what if' questions. It never gets easier, but I think you are exactly right. Having an amazing husband and supportive family and friends is the only thing that makes the hole seem a little bit smaller.
ReplyDeleteKristen - I'm so sorry to hear about your losses. You didn't leave a link or last name.
ReplyDeleteI will respect your privacy if that is what you want - otherwise I would love to chat with you.
Please feel free to email me: picy203@hotmail.com
I think we'd both find comfort in it.
xoxo
Sorry Lisa, didn't mean to leave out my last name. I usually talk pretty openly about this subject, because so many women (and men) in my life have experienced this type of loss.
ReplyDeleteI feel so incredibly blessed to have two beautiful and healthy boys.
Bryan and I would love to have more children . . . I try to trust that the Lord has a plan for our family however at times it is hard to embrace that truth.
I would love to help others as well, but honestly wouldn't know where to start.
Hugs to you!
I'm totally with you. I never thought about things like this as a kid; never thought about them in college; never even thought about it in my 20s. Now that I'm in my 30s there are very few people I know who have not been affected by miscarriage, stillbirth, or infertility. Why does this seem like such a surprise when it's so prevalent?
ReplyDeleteLisa, you are the best!
ReplyDeleteYou have such a big heart to be able to grieve for others in the midst of your own pain.
You are an inspiration, and a HUGE blessing!
Thank you so much for your prayers!!!!!!!!
Hi Lisa,
ReplyDeleteI can't remember where I linked over from, but I was intrigued by your blog title and stopped by to read. I'm so very sorry for your losses. I admire you for your bravery to write freely about this; through your pain, you are able to reach and help others.
I read through a few of your posts and in a nutshell, you're adorable. :) Your 'voice' is pure and honest and I love discovering blogs like yours. Following you, now. :)
P.S. - I'm Angie...nice to meet you!