A Bit of Transparency

This will most likely be TMI for a few people.

Proceed with warning ...

Many of you may not believe in sharing this kind of information. You don't have to agree with me.

All I know is that I have received a lot of healing and comfort from reading other blogs from women who have the courage to be vulnerable.

So here it is ... my attempt at vulnerability.

You all know Jay & I had a miscarriage at the end of October 2009.

You all know I've had a roller coaster of emotions and LOTS of therapy.

I've tried to be very open, honest and transparent about my feelings. You never know who you help and in what ways you encourage others to heal and share their own stories.

You also know that I truly believe in living through each feeling and emotion - it's the only way to heal long-term. I am trying very hard to learn from my girlfriend's miscarriages who have not healed and desperately asked me not to follow in their path. I have relied heavily on my supporters and have been attending regular therapy sessions.

What you may NOT know is that Jay & I have recently started trying to get pregnant again.

Have you HAD a miscarriage before?!?

Do you KNOW how hard it is to try again!?!

Do you have ANY idea how scary it is?!?

Do you KNOW the terrible thoughts my mind thinks?!?

Do you KNOW what a leap of faith this is?!?

So I guess what I'm saying is feel free to be mindful of us in your prayers.

For strength (and fertility) and for us to continue to rely on God's good graces.