Sunday, November 1, 2009


So ... here's where I am.


The realization that I'm not pregnant anymore is starting to really sink in.

And I'm left with a lot of sadness.

I'm finding it hard to create positivity today.

When I get dressed, I feel fat.

I have a chubby belly.

A belly meant for a sweet little baby.

But now it's empty.

I feel like I have nothing to show for pounds gained.

My abdomen hurts from my D&C.

I feel like I've done a million sit-ups and side crunches.

But for no reason really.

Not because I worked out.

Not because a baby is in there and tendons are stretching.

I just feel really empty.

And really, it's not about the weight or sore abdomen.

Those are just symptoms and reminders.

It's what they represent.


I know God will heal me.

Time will pass and I'll feel better.

But not today.

Today, I will honor my feelings.

And feel empty.

And that's okay.


becky said...

It is okay Lisa, feel it. My prayer for you today is that tomorrow you will feel better!

Kelly M said...

Oh Lisa, how I wish this wasn't something you have to go through! I'm praying for you.