Friday, March 19, 2010

That "thing"

You know that "thing" women get once a month?

That "thing" we hope NOT to get because we want to be pregnant.

Mine came today.

I'm not a fan of it.

Quite spiteful actually.

Trying my best to have an outward attitude that is NOT reflective of the mood going on inside my body.

Someone trying to be nice (and they were) said, "Well, on the bright side, this was your first month trying."

Let me fill everyone in on a little something.

It doesn't feel that way.

Because, the truth is, we have been trying for a healthy pregnancy since last June.

And well.

That sucks.

And I'm just not quite ready to look on the bright side today.

I'm gonna give myself today to feel sorry for myself.

Tomorrow will be a new day.

And we have fun plans with friends.

The End.


Anonymous said...

Ohh friend my heart goes out to you. I just returned from the most amazing Women's retreat. The woman who spoke, Susan Garlinger talked a lot about about her 7 years of infertility. She taught from the book of Esther, but also she taught us more about Peter. What an amazing testimony she has. She did eventually get pregnant. God did bless her with three children. She was pregnant and then 7 months after giving birth she was pregnant with twins!! TWINS.... She had absolutely nothing wrong with her, but GOD used this trial in her life, and she spoke about this trial. Who knows, but for such a time as this that GOD has a plan for you? It's all according to HIS plan, that unfortunately we can't see. Keep looking up, don't lose heart. This trial is perhaps preparing you for the greatest of things. God will carry you when you need it. I am praying for fertility and fun while trying!!! You are amazing, you are loved Hugs! Victoria

Anonymous said...

Ugh. I remember the depression that would hit every month when we were trying and it didn't happen. Then on the other weeks I would overanalyze everything about my body and mental state to try to figure out if I was pregnant. It is CONSUMING.

Here's hoping this was the last period you'll have in a long time!