Wednesday, June 11, 2008
This Ship Is (not) Sinking
I feel very overwhelmed.
I'm starting to lose my patience. It's harder and harder to tolerate more things on my plate. Meetings, birthdays, get-togethers, work, tutoring, errands. Things that are usually fun are starting to become a chore. Un-enjoyable. A source of stress.
The end of the school year is so close. But with that ... comes Field Day (which I'm in charge of), grades, report cards, and extremely energetic kids.
I hear myself saying:
1. "Stop talking please ... (one minute later) I still hear voices." This particular comment makes me smile every time I say it. I keep thinking "I'm going so crazy, that I'm sure I am hearing voices!"
2. "I will be very sad if you have to give yourself a stick for your behavior." Sticks are part of my behavior system. One stick in your 'pocket chart' means 5 minutes recess lost. Two sticks means 10 minutes of recess lost ... so on and so on.
3. "I'm sad you need a reminder about _______ on the 170th day of school."
4. "Show me you're ready for 2nd grade."
Today, I am reminded that I am human. That I too, have a short-fuse sometimes. That I can have less patience. That I can get frustrated, overwhelmed and stressed.
My dad would say, "Lisa, be sure to enjoy the journey." Today, I vow to live in each moment and (try) not to be overwhelmed with my TO DO list.
I pray for patience, a shorter fuse, and more compassion. I pray that He will help me to not feel so overwhelmed with everything, and that I may enjoy each moment. That my patience not be swept away by a wave, but stay with me even as the tide rises.