Monday, September 8, 2008

Transparency

Today isn't my best day.

I'm having anxiety issues.

I hate days like this. When I feel like my insides are revved, my tummy hurts and I feel out of control.

Please allow me to be transparent, vulnerable and open.

Maybe you can offer suggestions and/or help.

A couple months ago I did a blog post about my decision to go on a mission trip with Overlake Christian Church (and Jodie) to Africa. I am thrilled and excited and scared and hopeful and eager and nervous.

I can't wait.

But first I must get over the MONEY hurdle.

My goal is to raise $3,000 which covers the trip and mission expenses.

I sent out prayer and support letters at the beginning of summer, and also held a garage sale last June.

With my garage sale and very generous donations from friends and family, I have a raised $1,525.

I'm really stressing about money. I need to raise a lot more and I have no idea where it will come from.

I have been praying. Hard.

Should I get a second job? Should I remind people who I haven't heard from. Should I beg? Should I not go? Should I become a prostitute (okay ... joking on that last one).

I've been trying to weigh my decision to go, based on my money concerns.

I can't explain my need to go. It's like a calling. Like I just MUST go. Like I was BORN to do this.

So many thoughts are jumbled up inside my head. And it's making my tummy mad.

And then there is the MOST uncomfortable situation ... some people have said they will donate ... but haven't. I feel very awkward 'reminding' them about that. How do you say that?

What can I do besides pray and put it in God's hands?

Does anyone have suggestions?

My blog gets well over 100 hits a day ... and hardly anyone comments (which is totally fine) but I'm begging you ... let today be the day you make a comment and offer me some suggestions.

Please.

I'm on my knees, asking for help.

7 comments:

Kelly McPherson said...

Lisa, I've totally been in your position! We are joining you in prayer and cannot imagine going to Durban without you. God will provide. He always does. It has been my experience though, that God's timing tends to seem, uh, last minute to me. Be anxious for nothing, sister; God WILL provide!

CMK said...

Hi Lisa! I would send out an update of your trip, what you've collected so far and what your goal is. It would be a gentle reminder to those who intended to send something but haven't yet ... you might even put a date on when you need to make your final payment etc. December seemed a long way away when you sent your first letter out and now it's almost here - so people probably thought they had more time to send you their donation. Now you just need to remind them that you need their support - I know you'll find the right words to say - you are a very gifted writer! I love your blog and you too!

Nicole said...

God will provide. Seriously. I know it's hard to see it now, but if He wants you there... You'll be there one way or another. Ill be praying for you :)

Eve said...

It was so fun visiting with you at your mom's book signing the other day! We started talking about this trip to Africa and you were telling me about your plane ticket stuff and then we got interupted so we never finished that conversation. I didn't get to donate to your garage sale like I wanted to but I told you I would make a donation so count on me to help a little. I will send you a seperate email about this right now.

I think it's so wonderful you are going to Africa!

marisabutterworth said...

Hey Lisa. I have totally been here! I felt the same way about going to Thailand. I had a lot less time to fundraise too. I would totally send out an "UPDATE" letter to people that donated and are praying for you. This may be a kick in the pants for people that probably just forgot... plus it's not tacky. Tell them where you are going and what you are excited about. Tell them that you feel that you were born to do this!

What about doing a craigslist thing and asking people to donate to it? Then you can sell stuff and save that money?

Could you ever do a "Help Miss Lisa" bake sale or change drive at school? I don't know how that stuff works but I know that I would support you as a parent.

All I can suggest is praying a lot and actively try to raise more. For me, a lot came in at the last minute. It may not be the same for you...

Let your spirit rest in your calling and keep working on the money. I will keep thinking about this!

Erica said...

When are you having your next garage sale? It will give me an excuse to FINALLY clean out the storage unit! Let me know! We are both her to support you in any way we can! Love you xoxo

Amy Cheng said...

I've found that a lot of people want to give, they just don't know how. I wouldn't feel bad about reminding people. I always need reminders and I'm grateful when someone reminds me. I didn't get one of those letters, or did I? see....reminders!!! :) haha.