Today isn't my best day.
I'm having anxiety issues.
I hate days like this. When I feel like my insides are revved, my tummy hurts and I feel out of control.
Please allow me to be transparent, vulnerable and open.
Maybe you can offer suggestions and/or help.
A couple months ago I did a blog post about my decision to go on a mission trip with Overlake Christian Church (and Jodie) to Africa. I am thrilled and excited and scared and hopeful and eager and nervous.
I can't wait.
But first I must get over the MONEY hurdle.
My goal is to raise $3,000 which covers the trip and mission expenses.
I sent out prayer and support letters at the beginning of summer, and also held a garage sale last June.
With my garage sale and very generous donations from friends and family, I have a raised $1,525.
I'm really stressing about money. I need to raise a lot more and I have no idea where it will come from.
I have been praying. Hard.
Should I get a second job? Should I remind people who I haven't heard from. Should I beg? Should I not go? Should I become a prostitute (okay ... joking on that last one).
I've been trying to weigh my decision to go, based on my money concerns.
I can't explain my need to go. It's like a calling. Like I just MUST go. Like I was BORN to do this.
So many thoughts are jumbled up inside my head. And it's making my tummy mad.
And then there is the MOST uncomfortable situation ... some people have said they will donate ... but haven't. I feel very awkward 'reminding' them about that. How do you say that?
What can I do besides pray and put it in God's hands?
Does anyone have suggestions?
My blog gets well over 100 hits a day ... and hardly anyone comments (which is totally fine) but I'm begging you ... let today be the day you make a comment and offer me some suggestions.
I'm on my knees, asking for help.