Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Why Won't You Just Tell Me?

My neighbor is selling her house.

She hasn't told me this yet, but another neighbor casually brought it up in a conversation last week. When he told me, I thought, "That's weird, she hasn't told ME she's moving!"

How self-centered am I?!? But really ... why hasn't she told me?

So, for the last week, whenever I see her, I talk to her to see if she'll tell me. I don't know why I play these ridiculous games.

For example, last week when I was mowing my lawn, she was outside REALLY doing yard work. I mean, like "I'm about to move and want my yard to look good" yard work. We're talking MAJOR weeding, trimming, weed whacking, edging, etc. I said something lame like "So ... doin' some pretty serious yard work huh?" DORK!

She lightheartedly said, "Oh yah, just trying to spruce things up!"

DANG IT! TELL ME YOU'RE MOVING!

I was leaving for my walk yesterday, when I noticed my neighbor cleaning out her garage. REALLY cleaning it out, with boxes. I thought, "Ah ha! THIS is my chance!" I stopped in and said, "Hi Jennie! Cleaning out your garage huh?" 

UGH ... but I just CAN'T help it!

She said, "Oh, Lisa, just the cutie I was looking for (she really said that .. isn't that sweet?). Perfect ... do you want some beer hon?" Note: she's from the South and always calls me things like Hon, Sweetie, Cutie, etc.

"Oh, no thanks, I don't drink beer Jennie." I replied.

"Oh, you're not drinking beer anymore?"

"Jennie ... I don't EVER drink beer. I don't like it." I kindly reminded her.

"Oh, bummer, well, do you know anyone who would want it? Any of your friends maybe? It's good beer (not that I'd know) and I REALLY don't want it to go to waste."

JEEZ!

At this point, I got so tired of talking about beer (and a bit discouraged we got off the subject of me trying to get her to admit she's moving), that I just TOOK the dang beer!

So anyway, I remain uninformed. I heard her outside tonight while I was eating dinner but I didn't want to get offered anything else.

She's already given me beer (that I'll never drink), three bottles of wine (yah!), a tree (I'm not kidding) and a lawn mower (that I actually turned down). See above picture. Water-warped sign reads: FREE LAWN MOWER ... needs a tune-up.

I'll let you know once she confesses the truth ...

5 comments:

Amy Cheng said...

So, after talking about it, I just had to check out your blog. That story is hilarious. I'll take a beer. :)

Mary Diederichs said...

I love that she calls you endearing names. Too bad you're loosing her as a neighbor. Good news about the wine though.

Joe said...

freakin hilarious. She kept trying to pawn off her stuff on me too while I was cleaning out my garage and making garbage dump runs. When the for sale sign comes I hope you ask her about it non chalonte(sp?)

Jodie Howerton said...

Sheesh! I say, get all the free stuff you can! Especially try for more beer... :)

Lyonslove said...

Hey Lisa- I heard you had dinner with my brother yesterday. I am jealous. How fun.